The courage to step into the unknown

Svetlana: My name is Svetlana, and I live in Germany. I have three medical qualifications: I am a nurse, a therapeutic massage specialist, and a practitioner of Traditional Chinese Medicine.

For the past 12 years, I had my own practice, where I brought together two worlds: three thousand years of Traditional Chinese Medicine and a thousand years of academic medicine. I achieved very good results and took enormous pleasure in my work.

But life changed. I moved to another country, leaving behind much of what I had built. Today, I work in the care sector and am steadily moving toward my new goals.

I support myself financially and have built a stable everyday life for myself.
My family now lives across several countries. The people closest to me are my daughters. My eldest daughter lives separately with her husband and daughter. My younger daughter lives with me.

Svetlana: The motto of Traditional Chinese Medicine feels closest to me:

This idea resonates deeply with me. I try to live this way, and I see that this path helps me maintain inner balance and harmony.

Svetlana: Without a doubt, optimism.

Many qualities are important, but optimism is what has always helped me through everything.

I remember one incident from my youth. I was visiting a friend in the countryside and missed my train because the clocks had changed. It seemed like a hopeless situation: there was no other way to get home, and I had to be at work the next morning.
But I managed to calm myself down and thought, “How can that be? There has to be a way.”

Eventually, they let me ride in the cab of a freight train, and I made it home. Then I walked from the station carrying all the gifts from the countryside: a turkey, potatoes, eggs, butter, and everything else.

I had enough time to take a shower and arrived at work punctually.

For me, it was a great adventure.

After something like that, who could possibly convince me that there are situations with no way out?

That’s how I am with everything. That’s simply my character.

Svetlana: The most significant and life-changing move for me was moving to Poland. I left behind my entire familiar world and found myself in another country, another culture, and completely different circumstances.

The first year was difficult. I missed familiar food, my friends, my old way of life. There were moments when I even cried. But then something shifted inside me. I stopped trying to recreate what I had before and started building a new life with the opportunities I had.

Once I began taking action, the process completely absorbed me. Creating a new home, a new circle of people, and a new way of life became an exciting adventure. In the end, I achieved a great deal, and I can say that I am proud of myself.

It was in Poland that I discovered what freedom really means. We grew up in the Soviet world, with its own conventions and limitations, where many things were perceived as the only possible way of living. When you find yourself in another country and see how other people live, you begin to understand that you can think more broadly, want more, and dream on a larger scale.

In Poland, I began to feel like the creator of my own life. I created my home, my garden, my family, my business, my workspace. I understood what true independence meant.

Another major discovery was realizing that I could live without constantly looking over my shoulder at what other people might think. When you are no longer surrounded by the familiar circle of people who judge you or expect you to behave in a certain way, you begin to hear yourself more clearly. I realized that I could be free in my decisions and choose my own path.

After the birth of my younger daughter, there was a period when I spent a lot of time at home and had the opportunity to listen to myself. I realized that before moving, I had been living like a hamster on a wheel: taking on too many tasks, constantly rushing somewhere, while many of those actions had no real meaning.

That period helped me rethink my life.

The reasons for my moves were different. Not every change was planned. Sometimes life simply unfolded that way, and I had to accept its new circumstances.

But experience helps me. I already know that things work out. Not always immediately, and not always the way we plan, but eventually they do. I am also helped by confidence in my own abilities and the understanding that people live everywhere, and you can create a new life anywhere.

Svetlana: Yes, without a doubt.

Despite all the difficulties involved in moving, my experience has shown me that even small efforts eventually produce results. Life gradually becomes what we want it to be if we keep taking action.

Svetlana: I suppose there really is a lightness in me, but there is depth as well. I don’t deliberately try to present myself in any particular way. It is simply part of who I am.
I like being a woman who can be serious, wise, and deep, while still preserving joy, curiosity, and the ability to enjoy simple things.

For example, I have a granddaughter who will soon turn 12. We can jump on a trampoline together, dance, make funny videos, sing in the car, laugh, and simply enjoy being together.

It is very important to me to preserve this part of myself. I don’t want to lose it.

Svetlana: No, I have always loved life.

I remember being a child and spending summers at my grandmother’s village. I could lie on a haystack for hours. It seemed to me that the sky was incredibly close. I would look at the stars and experience this extraordinary feeling, wondering: Does the sky have an end? Could it somehow come closer? Things like that.

I grew up surrounded by meadows and forests. I still remember cornflowers, daisies, wild strawberries, dense woods that seemed impossible to penetrate, and the smell of grass after the rain.

I especially loved Saturdays, when the bathhouse was heated. The unmistakable scent of smoke, steaming herbs, and birch branches would drift through the entire village. My grandmother always rinsed our hair with herbal infusions, and that fragrance has remained the scent of childhood for me forever.

I remember fresh milk, the smell of the farm, even the smell of silage. For some reason, all of it filled me with this extraordinary feeling of joy and the fullness of life.
To this day, nature remains my greatest source of energy and inner balance.

My grandmother had an enormous influence on me. She was an incredible cook. Thanks to her, I understood from childhood how much pleasure delicious food can bring. Ever since then, I have loved cooking and making the people close to me happy.

My grandmother also gave me my love of beautiful clothes. She sewed and knitted beautifully. Almost everything in the house was made by her hands. An old chest held beautiful dresses, skirts, sweaters, and blouses.

I especially remember one dress she gave me. It was black velvet with sheer lace inserts. It seemed like a true work of art. Whenever I wore it, I noticed admiring glances.

I can still remember the quality of that fabric. I have never encountered anything quite as beautiful since. I even remember the tiny loops sewn inside the dress that held the straps in place so they wouldn’t show. Such a tiny detail, yet even then I was struck by how much love and attention someone had put into making that garment.

Perhaps a love of life is made from memories like these. From knowing how to notice scents, beauty, taste, the warmth of human hands, and how to take pleasure in the simplest things.

That is the feeling I still try to preserve within myself.

Svetlana: You know, as we grow older, it is incredibly important not to lose the desire to learn, to keep up with the world, and to make plans.
I remember a man who made an enormous impression on me. He was around 90. There was a small garden in front of his house, and I often saw him working there. One day, I couldn’t simply walk past.
He told me that he kept everything just as it had been when his wife was alive. What struck me was that his garden had not only fruit and vegetables, but flowers as well.
I asked him, “Isn’t it difficult for you? Doesn’t your back hurt?”
He replied, “As long as I’m working, nothing hurts. The moment there’s no work to do, something immediately starts hurting.”))

Then he told me about the rhythm of his life. As early as February, he starts growing seedlings on his windowsill. Later he plants them in the garden, sows seeds, waters everything, tends to the plants, harvests his crops, preserves food for the winter, and shares whatever is left with other people.

His life is essentially planned almost a year ahead. He knows exactly what he will be doing and when.

What fascinated me was not so much his diligence, but the fact that he was always living toward the future. He had plans not only for today, but for the next season and the next year.

And it seemed to me that this was precisely what kept him alive.

He wasn’t merely existing. He was still creating.

That was when I understood something very clearly: life is prolonged not only by healthy food and movement, although both are undoubtedly important.

Plans prolong life.

As long as a person makes plans, as long as they are curious about tomorrow, as long as they want to create something, learn something, or share something with others, they are truly alive.

Svetlana: Yes, my understanding of beauty has changed enormously.

I used to think beauty meant perfect proportions, an ideal appearance, and a flawless image. Now I understand that this kind of perfection simply does not exist. What we can create in our imagination or see in photographs through retouching and filters is not reality.

Today, beauty to me is individuality, self-confidence, and harmony.

Things that once seemed like flaws look different to me now. The changes in my body after having children, for example, no longer make me feel regret. On the contrary, I see them as signs of a life lived, of motherhood and love.

I don’t see them as flaws. I see them as a reward.

They are part of my story. They are proof that I became the mother of two beautiful, talented daughters.

So today, my understanding of beauty is much deeper.

Svetlana: I used to think youth meant energy, a beautiful body, and an enormous capacity to learn, discover new things, and explore the world.

Today, as biological youth gradually fades, I understand that true youth is an inner state.
I look at people my own age and see the difference. Some people seem to have already switched into a mode of simply living out the rest of their lives. They are content with everything as it is, they stop developing, and they lose interest in new things.

I still want to dream, discover, experiment, and move forward. I am physically active. I am interested in life.

For me, that is youth.

Svetlana: I admit that at first, accepting the changes was difficult.

When I noticed the first signs of aging, I didn’t want to simply resign myself to them. I searched for knowledge: Why is this happening? What can I do? How can I support myself?

At one point, I looked in the mirror and saw a tired face, even though I felt wonderful inside. That disconnect between my inner state and my appearance was a very difficult realization for me.

Eventually, I understood that aging is a natural process that cannot be completely avoided. Even if someone has every opportunity in the world, time still follows its own course.

But that doesn’t mean we have to give up.

I decided to do everything within my power: take care of my health, exercise, eat well, and use the modern options available for taking care of my appearance.
I also have a positive attitude toward cosmetic procedures and plastic surgery if they help someone feel better.

The important thing is to approach them consciously and without extremes. For me, balance matters: not fighting age, but not neglecting myself either.

I don’t give up, but I don’t fight nature.

Svetlana: Today, I know exactly what kind of relationship I want to create.

A relationship based on mutual respect, shared values, and common goals. I want a partnership between two people who make each other stronger, grow together, travel, and share an interest in culture, art, and life.

It is important to me that a relationship is not only comfortable, but enriching.

I see an intelligent, caring, self-confident man with a good sense of humor beside me.

Svetlana: Yes, there are differences. First of all, they come from culture, upbringing, traditions, and history.

Men from the post-Soviet world grew up within a different system of values. There is often a more traditional division of roles: the man takes greater responsibility for providing for the family and dealing with the world outside the home, while the woman is more focused on the home and children.

What I really appreciate in Poland is the family culture. I saw many men there who were genuine partners within their families: they worked, took care of the home, and accepted responsibility.

That is the kind of partnership that feels close to me, when a man and a woman form a strong team.

In Germany, I am still getting to know the mentality. The men I have had the opportunity to meet have struck me as cultured, respectful, and well-rounded.

Svetlana: When it comes to women, I also see a great deal that different cultures could learn from one another.
Women from the post-Soviet world often give an enormous amount to their families, but sometimes forget about themselves. European women are often better at choosing themselves, their own interests, and their personal space.
I think the best path lies in balance: preserving femininity, caring for your family, but not losing yourself in the process.

Svetlana: Yes, of course. There have been moments like that.

For example, when the Soviet Union collapsed, the future felt incredibly uncertain. It seemed as though the world had fallen apart, and no one knew what would happen next.
But afterward, a new chapter began, one that brought many opportunities.

It was the same with moving to different countries. At the moment when your familiar life ends, it feels as though everything is collapsing. Later, you realize that it was not an ending, but a transition.

Every major change in my life has taken me to a new and better level.
That experience taught me not to fear change and to trust life.

Loss often means not only losing the old, but also creating space for something new.

Svetlana: I would put it in one sentence: focus on everything that is good.
If I were to expand on that, happiness for me is gratitude, the ability to see beauty, noticing the good instead of criticizing, and maintaining optimism.
It is surrounding yourself with people you enjoy and beautiful things, doing work you love, continuing to grow, and sharing.
Sharing love, joy, knowledge, warmth, or material things. All of it makes a person happier.

Svetlana: I have several ways.

First, I use the power of a smile. When I feel my mood changing, I deliberately keep a smile on my face for at least two minutes. It works surprisingly well: the brain receives a signal that the “joy muscles” are active, and my state gradually begins to change.

Second, breathing practices. For example, box breathing: inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four, and hold again for four. It also helps to breathe with an exhale that is twice as long as the inhale.

Third, an eye exercise called “Snowflake.”

I like the fact that all of these things are available at any moment and in any place. If the stress is intense, movement helps me enormously: an 8–10 kilometer walk, dancing, or simply cleaning the house.

Svetlana: Of course))

I deliberately get up about two hours before I need to leave so that I don’t have to rush.
It is important to me to drink coffee slowly from a beautiful cup, have breakfast in peace, take a shower, and give myself time for self-care.

These are my little rituals: skincare, my hair, my hands, everything that helps me feel polished and put together.

I also do breathing practices in the morning, even if only for a few minutes. And while I drink my coffee, I mentally plan my day: what needs to be done, what matters most, what can be changed or moved to another day.

It helps me stay productive while maintaining a sense of harmony.

Svetlana: The first thing that came to mind was my phone))

These days, so much of our lives really is concentrated in it.

It is not just a means of communication. It is my work tool, my notes, plans, ideas, and information. Through my phone, I interact with the modern world.

But, of course, what matters is not the phone itself, but how we use it.

Svetlana: Yes, to a certain extent, solitude can be beneficial.

We are social beings, after all. We need people around us. But there are moments when solitude helps us hear ourselves more clearly.

When you need to rethink something, understand your true desires, or reconsider your goals and values, time alone becomes incredibly valuable.

With age and life experience, many things change: our views, beliefs, and priorities.
Sometimes solitude is also helpful during difficult periods, when you first need to understand your own emotions so that you don’t overwhelm the people you love with them.

But I wouldn’t describe myself as someone who enjoys being alone all the time.

Svetlana: It depends on the kind of criticism.

If it is constructive, I receive it with gratitude. I understand that sometimes we cannot evaluate ourselves objectively, and another person’s perspective can help us notice something important.

If criticism helps me become better, I listen.

But if it is destructive criticism, intended not to help but to humiliate or emphasize flaws, I don’t take it on board. To me, it simply reflects that person’s attitude toward me, or toward themselves, and nothing more.

Svetlana: I’ve actually never thought about it.

Perhaps it is simply an intrinsic part of my character. I have always been curious about life, and that curiosity never seems to run out.

I am interested in learning new things, exploring the world, and discovering new possibilities.

Svetlana: That’s a very interesting question.

I think everyone should, at least once, do something they have never allowed themselves to do before.

Buy something they have dreamed of for years but always considered too expensive. Take a trip that once seemed impossible. Or allow themselves to see who they are through someone else’s eyes, as happened to me through this project.

During the preparation for the photoshoot, I was asked to expose my forehead and pull my hair back. That was unusual for me. I had worn bangs all my life and always believed that an exposed forehead didn’t suit me.

The same was true of sheer clothing.

But I trusted the process.

And when I saw the result, I realized that sometimes we are the ones limiting ourselves through our own ideas about who we are.

Svetlana: What surprised me most was seeing how a person’s inner state could be transformed into something real and visible.

Ksenia has incredible energy. You can feel it, and it energizes you. At the same time, she organizes the process very gently. She guides you without putting pressure on you.
Before the shoot, of course, I was nervous: How should I stand? What should I do with my hands? How do I pose differently from one shot to another?

But thanks to her approach, I gradually began to trust the process.

I relaxed and was able simply to be myself.

I was deeply impressed by how individually every look was created: your type is studied, every detail is considered, everything is designed specifically for that particular person.
Once I saw the entire process, I understood that I was in safe hands.

And then there were Alexei and Nisha, two completely distinct personalities, each with their own incredible charisma, who made an irreplaceable contribution. What fantastic people!

For me, that entire period in Amsterdam became a real adventure, a beautiful, vivid, and deeply meaningful event in my life.

Svetlana: I would tell myself:

Svetlana: I have gone through those emotions myself, and I can say this: wanting to remain young and beautiful is absolutely normal.

But it is important to understand that we cannot stop the aging process.

What we can do is take care of ourselves, support our health, and preserve our beauty as much as we naturally can. It is important not to forget to enjoy life, to choose ourselves, to do what brings us joy, and not to focus on fear.

Maturity can become the most vibrant period of life.

The children are grown, much of what we once worked toward has already been created, and suddenly there is an opportunity for creativity, growth, travel, and discovering entirely new sides of ourselves.

The most important thing is not to become stagnant.

Svetlana: Probably the misconception that mature women become less interesting or less valuable.

Yes, our appearance changes. The outer shell becomes different. But inside, a woman remains young.

Only now she has more experience, wisdom, knowledge, and depth. Age changes the form, but it does not erase the person.

Svetlana: Of course, there are things I could have done differently. But then the question arises: would I have become the woman I am today?

I am very happy with my transformations and with the person I have become. So I would repeat everything connected with my optimism, courage, change, moving to new countries, my desire to try new things, and my curiosity about the world.

Those are the things that made my life so rich.

Svetlana: I would want them to feel a zest for life.

And also to remember that we share the same genes, which means they will be just as successful))

But the most important message is this: We are the authors of our own lives. What our lives become depends, to a great extent, on us: on our decisions, our desires, and our efforts. And most importantly, always keep moving toward your true self.